“The Purpose”

My name is Dean Taylor. I was born in Quesnel, B.C.   I was raised by parents who believed in God and were baptized into the Baptist faith.  My parents loved God but when they saw the gossip and contradictions in that religion they chose to teach us about God separate from it.  I remember being taught about God at a young age by may parents. They had good hearts and tried to teach us the best they knew how.

I remember my first conversation with my Dad about God.  I was about five years old and asked him who God was;  I remember his response as he shared his belief with me and this witness had a profound effect on my life. My Dad, just like the rest of us wasn’t even close to perfect, but His desires were perfect. Before he died he became one of my best friends and I miss him dearly. I’m so greatful to have had such a good hearted person as an earthly father.

My mother is a saint in my eyes.  So kind and loving towards her family and anyone else in her circle of influence.  She has been a solid unwavering influence in my life and I have a deep respect and love for Her.

My love also for my Heavenly Family is overwhelming.  I miss them so much that it hurts, my spirit and heart remember there love for me and this spark of knowledge propels me forward in my journey.

I remember when I was young how my faith in God was perfect and without doubt.  I was so happy and life was so good until I turned eight years of age.  When I became eight years old and was in the second grade something happened that changed everything.

I remember how it started.  It was in the library at Bouchie Lake elementary school in Quesnel, British Columbia, Canada.  I found a book that showed the planets and beyond and how insignificant this earth was.  It then dawned on me that I am just a little particle on a planet that is just a little particle of the universe.  I remember the fear that entered my heart as this dawned on me.  For the first time I felt doubt and fear about these things.

At this time I remember clearly the reasoning that entered my mind and heart and how profound it was.  The idea entered into me that if I was just a particle on the Earth that was a particle in the universe then I was insignificant.  It was extremely difficult to accept this idea.  It caused overwhelming fear as a result of the following thought;  “what if I’m not important and don’t matter, what if I’m just the product of chance and I’m just a particle of the universe.”  The thought scared me beyond my ability to express.

After this day in the library everything changed. I remember crying myself to sleep at night because of the darkness and fear that overcame me as a result of my lack of knowledge about the existence of God.  It became a need for me to know that I mattered and this knowledge was directly connected to whether or not there was a God who loved me.  As a consequence of my not knowing, I went into a deep depression for many years.

I remember as a child reaching out to my parents for help to know there was a God so I could find relief from my extreme suffering.  I remember my parents laboring with me to help by giving comforting and saying things like, “even our dating system is set by the birth of Jesus Christ”.  This gave comfort but it still wasn’t enough because I didn’t have my own witness.  As a result of not knowing there was a God, I went into a profound depression from the time I was eight until the time I was eighteen years old. As much as I tried, it was something I couldn’t effectively deal with.

I remember watching other kids playing and being happy and asking myself, “how can they be happy not knowing if they matter and are important.”  I wanted so badly to not have these thoughts and inconsistencies so I could enjoy life and be happy like other kids.

This tormented existence continued and  I remember that I considered taking my life in the sixth grade as a result of this profound depression at not knowing.  As a last ditch effort to get help I wrote a letter to my mother expressing my determination to end my life if I couldn’t get answers to my questions.  My Mother as loving as she was took me aside and labored with me to help me through this desperate period. She wasn’t able to give me the knowledge I sought but was able to give me enough hope to prevent me from taking my life.

I continued through elementary school and High School being profoundly troubled by these inconsistencies.  After years of depression and struggling to get answers I remember when I was 16 having a life altering experience.  I received a very clear and profound communication from God that He wanted me to read the Bible.  At this point I was willing to do anything to relieve the suffering.  It took a period of time to get through the whole Bible but when I got to the New Testament I was filled with so much power that my body was physically affected by it.  I actually felt and heard the power as I entrenched myself in the record of the life of Jesus Christ.  I remember the intensity of my desire to  have the same kinds of experiences that the early apostles did. I desired with every once of my being to receive the fullness the same way they did. My prayer and desire was intense beyond anything that I can describe. As a result, I ended up pleading for years to be delivered and saved.  I begged to be led to His truth.

When I was nearing my eighteenth birthday on Christmas day of 1988 my Grandma Redden told me that she had read a record many years ago of the ancient Americas.  She described it to my family and God bore a profound witness to me that I should get that book. She said that it was The Book of Mormon.  I love my grandma so much and miss her so much. I’m very greatful that she had the courage to share her feelings at this time.  When I heard her saying these things I knew I had to read this book.  I couldn’t rest until I had it.  Fortunately, Jessica, one of the individuals in my home at the time had an aunt, Coleen McDonald who was a member of the Mormon faith who could get a copy of this record of the ancient Americas for me to read.  My grandmother also wanted a copy to re-read.  I realize now that if it wasn’t for my grandma Redden and her witness of the Book of Mormon I never would have known or received as I did.  She was an instrument in the Lords hands to help me to eventually receive the fullness.  I find it more than chance that my Grandmother’s father was of Cherokee descent making her a descendant of the people who the book is written about.

It was this same night (Dec 25,2012) that the Book of Mormon came my to Grandmother and myself.  That evening as I read from it’s pages I recieved a powerfull witness from God of its truth.  I remember excitedly exclaiming to my family, “this is the wisdom God is giving in the last days!” Over a four month period of time I read and received many powerful witness that it was from God, witnesses that affected my physical body.  A power would fill my body when I read to the point that I could physically hear it! It would come when I was reading and then subside when I stopped.  I find it interesting that the same power and energy is flowing through my body as I write this.

After four months of this occuring I tracked down the missionaries from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints to teach and baptize me.  At that time the church still had a commission to do ordinances.

Before going further I want to express the gratitude I have for the Baptism I received at the hand of John Goodwin. This baptism was ratified by the Holy Spirit of promise, culminating in the Baptism of Fire and the Holy Ghost.  Since then I have had experiences beyond my ability to describe. As time progressed, my knowledge and faith expanded until I knew the Lords face and heard from His own mouth of my standing before Him.

It’s also my great privilege to have been led by God to Dana my wife. I received an ordinance in a temple that married us but something came later that was much more real and that connected us further.  There is so much more to this plan of salvation than people realize!

God intends this blog to focus on what we do as mortals to prevent Him from giving as He desires.  It’s also going to focus on how to align with His laws and qualify for the fullness of His blessings.  I hope this can be a place where seekers of truth can learn to practically apply correct principles and knowledge in a way that allows Jesus Christ to more liberally apply His atonement in their behalf.  I have a witness that when we give our all to God we enable Him to give His all to us.  We just need to be patient because His fullness comes incrementally as we align with the law that governs the giving of it.

Of all records I’ve read, the book of Mormon has been the most influential tool to aid me in my journey; as a result, it will be used often to illuminate and reinforce truth. In my opinion this record is the greatest Book God has given to our generation to clearly lay out the process of coming into His presence.  The things which have occurred to me on my journey have aligned perfectly with what’s contained in that record.  I can’t tell how many times I’ve read The Book of Mormon to be surprised at finding things that I never noticed until after I had the experience myself.  Some of it’s gems hide in plain site until we are prepared to see. In this blog I’m going to attempt to pull some of these things out into plain view and expand on them.  I’m also going to use personal experiences of people living now to further reinforce that these truths do apply to our day. These are people who have aligned with the same laws to receive the same outcomes. As these people find each other they take comfort in finding out the basic process they followed is the same.

First, they receive correct doctrine, knowledge and principles.  They then turn to God in prayer, seeking with pure intent to know the truth until a divine witness is received.  They then act on that knowledge and the cycle repeats. They gain faith, they repent, get baptized by authority, receive the Baptism of fire and the Holy Ghost. This gift enhances there ability to hear what’s communicated from Heaven. It facilitates a greater connection to the mind of God enabling us to to be guided into His presence.

I struggle to find the words to adequately describe that experience.  He joyously embraced and kissed me and then gave words of comfort.  I didn’t qualify for that experience, He qualified me by covering my debt and forgiving it.  In these situations the recipient is left keenly aware that they had an experience with God.  It could be in the form of a dream as it was with Solomon, or in vision, or in person like it was with Moses, Abraham and others.  However they come, these experiences leave a lasting impression. I left the experience knowing we are all greatly loved of God and also that He is very anxious to commune with us.

It’s my observation that those who don’t cultivate within themselves this ability to quiet their minds and clearly commune with Him are at great risk of being overcome.  If you can’t hear the shepherd you are at risk of not finding yourself in His fold.

Personal revelation is the foundation upon which we allow The Lord to save us, but most of the work is done by Him. He has the blueprint,  charts the plan and then instructs us from day to day.  As we follow, He then supports and protects and provides for us by the powers of Heaven. (3 Nephi 13:33) As we obey it’s our faith in the Savior to keep His promises which allows Him to lighten our burdens and find rest to our souls. We learn to let go of worry and fear through Him. Jesus is working to prepare as many as will hear Him to be preserved and gathered.

In 3 Nephi 10 the Lord makes a statement out of the darkness to the distressed survivors of the destruction at took place at the time of His death:

    5 – “And again, how oft would I have gathered you as a hen gathered her chickens under her wings, yea, O ye people of the house of Israel,
who have fallen; how oft would I have gathered you as a hen gathered her chickens, and ye would not.”

These people didn’t hear Him and were destroyed, but there was another group he addressed right before who were gathered because they did hear Him:

4 – “O ye people of these great cities which have fallen… how oft have I gathered you as a hen gathered her chickens under her wings, and have nourished you.”  

Our divine parent(s) want a people who will know and obey the Saviors voice so He can preserve and eventually gather them as He did with this group of Nephites.

The Saviors voice is called the still, small, voice for a reason.

Still:  Not Audible
Small:  Easy to miss
Voice:  Comes from Christ

GUITAR ANALOGY: TUNING INTO GOD’S VOICE

I’m trying to put words something that is very hard to describe.  My closest comparison to learning to hear Gods voice is the process of learning to tune a guitar. When I first started playing guitar I couldn’t tune it myself as a result of not being able to hear the tones well enough. They were there, but I couldn’t hear them. I would try time and again only to end up asking someone who could hear to tune it for me.  A short time later they would have it tuned and hand it back. It was frustrating.

Eventually, as I continued to practice and listen, I noticed that I was beginning to be able to tell when my guitar was getting out of tune. It just didn’t sound or feel right. Something was off? As time went on this became more easily noticed. As I persisted I became aware that I could now hear what was previously hidden from my view. There it was!

At this point I started to tune the guitar on my own. It was a struggle, but I could hear well enough to do it. In time the clarity of the tones increased and the process became easier.

I’ve learned with both tuning in processes with Gods voice and music that it takes practice and experience. I listened to guitars for many years, but I didn’t learn to hear until I began to pay attention, practice and diligently apply myself.  The same principles applied to my quest to hear The Lord clearly.

In my earlier years I coasted along, not really noticing the details of that still, small voice which accompanied me.  I did what felt right and brought light and joy, but it wasn’t precise and clear. Figuratively speaking, it was as if I was stumbling and bludgeoning my way through.  As a result of my craving for light and my desires to know Him, some clear communications did get through from time to time. For instance, at some point the Savior was finally able to get through that He is in fact speaking, but I’m not hearing. As that conviction internalized it became my mission to always be able to hear Him so I could follow.  I fasted and prayed many times over the years that followed and endlessly pleaded for help until finally after much pondering, effort and practice it came; I could hear clearly when I quieted my mind and applied myself to this end.

Our mortal bodies provide significant opposition to receiving the Lords communications.  Oliver Cowdery learned the hard way that communing with the Lord is a process that takes work, practice and experience.

Doctrine and Covenants 9:7-8

7 Behold, you have not understood; you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me.
8 But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.”

Oliver didn’t realize that translating ancient materials equated to conversing with God.  It’s a conversation where ideas are received, processed in our mind and then confirmed by God through the feelings of our heart.

The process of bringing forward from the spirit to the mortal mind is very similar to the process of translation as described to Oliver Cowdery.  In essence, what we are doing is translating intelligence and ideas from God into our spoken language.

Joseph Smith stated that  “All things whatsoever God in his infinite wisdom has seen fit and proper to reveal to us, while we are dwelling in mortality, in regard to our mortal bodies, are revealed to us in the abstract, and independent of affinity of this mortal tabernacle, but are revealed to our spirits precisely as though we had no bodies at all.”
-Joseph Fielding Smith (editor), Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 355

Joseph Smith also said “The things of God are of deep import; and time and experience and careful and ponderous and solemn thoughts can only find them out. Thy mind, 0 man, if thou wilt lead a soul unto salvation, must stretch as high as the utmost heavens and search into and contemplate the darkest abyss and the broad expanse of eternity — thou must commune with God!”
– Joseph Smith, the Prophet-teacher: A Discourse By Brigham Henry Roberts

Jesus taught that the Kingdom of God is within us.  Luke 17:20-21

20 ҦAnd when he was demanded of the Pharisees, when the kingdom of God should come, he answered them and said,
    The kingdom of God cometh not with observation:”
    21 “Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you.”

He wants us to look within because that is where we will find His voice.

Enos learned to have conversations with God and found it was a process that required long sessions of going inward in mighty prayer.

    4 “And my soul hungered; and I kneeled down before my Maker, and I cried unto him in mighty prayer and supplication for mine own soul; and all the day long did I cry unto him; yea, and when the night came I did still raise my voice high that it reached the heavens.”

5 “And there came a voice unto me, saying: Enos, thy sins are forgiven thee, and thou shalt be blessed.”
– Book of Mormon, Enos 1

After this experience Enos realized that he could converse with God. He also knew the effort involved as indicated by the next quote:

    11 “And after I, Enos, had heard these words, my faith began to be unshaken in the Lord; and I prayed unto him with many long strugglings for my brethren, the Lamanites.
-Book of Mormon,  Enos 1

It’s the same struggle for all of us, we only need to desire it enough to pay the necessary sacrifice.  I have been blessed beyond my expectations and hope the same for every other soul.  May God bless you all on your journey.